Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Put the Blame on Mame


While I keep writing these letters, technology advances on the sidelines. Buzz words include nano-implant brain chips connected to a quantum cloud... the nitty gritty mechanics of telepathy. In Alfred Lambremont's interview with Magnus Olsson, they discuss HAARP's scalar waves and Tesla tech rays, the next generation of EMFs. Olsson suggests scalar technology can emit voices in a subject's mind which can induce acts of terror, as could have been the case with Aaron Alexis, the Navy Yard shooter. Before he shot and killed 12 people at the Washington Navy Yard, he went to the police complaining about voices he thought were emitted from a microwave machine. He scratched out the words 'my ELF weapon' (extremely low frequency) on his Remington 87. The media is reporting these nuggets but draws a blank as to their meaning.

Is Aaron another military experiment in the application of technology picked up from extraterrestrials, or quite simply developed by the army? There have been reports about MKUltra mind control methods since 1950. Doesn't the mainstream media look dim to anyone who keeps up with the internet?

According to Magnus Olsson, HAARP waves can also be used to stimulate the brain, even arouse erotically. It begs the question... could my angel be some NSA flub with headphones? If it wasn't for the weather puzzles, I would entertain the notion. One more reason I'm relieved there's no hurricane name conspiracy theories on the net, but the telepathic link is something we'll be hearing about more and more. Face it Bill, hearing voices is also a marvel of modern technology.

Here at Wind Mined we're in test phase too, honing and tweaking, egging and goading the mystery source. Exploring techniques which, I'd like to point out, haven't yet been entertained in the mainstream. I even read the extraterrestrial white orb technology used to make crop circles is now being exploited by the Russian army, explaining perhaps the mid level artistry behind this year's batch. So let's go over what we've observed this summer; it's full of technological innovation ...





The last blog entry left off in a verbal scuffle when tropical storm Barbara - barbare ah! - charmed me into replacing the word 'criminal' with 'romantic outlaw'. This was punctuated a couple days later by Andrea in the GOM.  And... rea (rea is legalese for guilty) And guilty! Putting the blame on mame... I think I'll crank it up a notch to 'heretic troublemaker'. And worthy of honorable mention: a hot earthquake zone in Halmera, Indonesia - haul Maher ha! Never met and already arguing like an old married couple. Still sparking too... when I noticed this gorging red new rule, it was time to play scrabble.








~

The whole month of June we worked to finish the house. Here are some pictures to go with June 30th's tropical storm Rumbia  - room be ah!

In an effort to render what no camera has been able to so far, I arduously copy/pasted the view in this first one. I was going to do it over cause it looks suspiciously cubist, but yesterday's tropical storm Fernand made it ok to look like a Fernand Leger painting.




Fernand Leger:




Here's the result of auto-correction that took one second, and let's move on with this!
























Around the time we finished the pool at the end of June, tropical storm Dalila brightened my day... da, Liliane est la! Thanks Mom, for making this beautiful Lily pad possible.

Enough well-being by design, let's get back to the smut lab. I'm going over the same stuff I already tweeted you about because I was made to understand this is the syllabus. I hope you like to reminisce!

Remember back on June 29th you aired a new rule about Chris Brown beating up Paula Deen, the second gorilla lady (after Dr. Laura) to use the word nigger and get fired? Like usual, when I hear you say the name Chris Brown my catsuit gets zipped and I sharpen my claws. This time I figured perhaps you wanted to get beat up... again... using the word nigger. Remember the first time? It was the Dr. Laura episode when you were throwing the unabridged N word around left and right... even on Larry King. I sent you this video. Juny didn't know he was being taped... six days later the gay Rutgers student was unknowingly broadcast having sex and jumped off a bridge. Ping! In the interim I've been trying to keep Juny well informed, telling him one day a 6 inch alien with headphones could be ringing the doorbell.






Now the historical context is set... so here's what happened this time. The word blew up again on TV... at least you didn't call Jay Z king of the niggers, only king of the negroes... When I saw the Chris Brown new rule, I tweeted you the following 'niggerology taunt' and called it test #2, an audio tape of Juny and I talking after making love, where I try to call sweetie 'niggy'. You'll recall test #1 was the picture of me at Cap Juluca which instantaneously preceded a halt of Brooklyn Bridge traffic for an hour.


@billmaher Did you say something about gettin beat up by C Brown? In the interest of science and S&M, here's test #2: 







The first thing I noticed after the test was tropical storm Gorio on July 3rd. Yikes!



I had noticed it previously as Rumbia, but storms in the vicinity of the Philippines have two names, a local and international one... how convenient!

This was happening in the middle of the George Zimmerman trial. It took a few days before the experiment yielded results... almost like it was acting politically correct, waiting for the weekend so as not to interrupt CNN's continuous coverage of Trayvon Martin.

By Saturday July 6th, it happened. At 1:14 am, a runaway train exploded at Lac Megantic, Quebec, not far from where I used to lived in Montreal and the surrounding countryside. I tweeted you about this one.

@billmaher Like meg antic? I got Terabytes and Brontobytes.




On July 2nd, four days before the blast, you had tweeted about Snowden's pilot circling Moscow airport... well, this inspired the next stunt.


#EdwardSnowden still stuck in Moscow airport?? The guy sent to pick him up must be getting tired of circling

On the same day as the train accident on July 6th, there's the Asiana plane crash, a poetic and befitting reaction to my 'niggerology taunt' megabyte antic.

Ass he an 'A'. 

There you go. The results of Test #2... pinging the physics of emotion - what a mess! And Flight 214? Valentines day, of course. Following the crash I saw super-duper numerological interpretations of that number, but this one Keeps It Simple Stupid... that's how we roll.



July 8th's wicked typhoon Soulik capped the episode.



On July 8th I tried to use 140 characters or less to tweet you about what was going on. I was answering your tweet which reminded me curiously of the handicapped runner Oscar Pistorius "I didn't kill my girlfriend" episode from my 'What Constitutes Murder?' blog post of Feb. 19.

"I wouldn't shoot her thru the bathroom door" is the new "I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers"

@billmaher Even if the cracker is a nigger? 

@billmaher I felt it wise not to add 'and you get the crumbs'. X is vexed enough already what with Ass He An "A" circling right out the sky.

Of course a plane crash is not funny. Then why were so many jokes made about it? You got chided by twits when you posted the 'joke' below... they were saying, "too soon, Bill, too soon".

"Yes Asiana Airlines - do you have any flights that go all the way to San Francisco?"

I tried to cheer you up:

@billmaher I thought it was funny when Mahabodhi Temple (Ma Ha! Body) got blasted after I sent you the nude on the video.


Then the bottom fell out when the San Diego anchorwoman read the NTSB intern's joke names of pilots, as naturally as if they were their real names.




It seemed you had assimilated the 'Ass he an A' insinuation when you declared in an obviously set-up question and answer tirade how you feel very bad for the pilot circling up there forever.




So I fed you another jpg cine-bun.


Actually, you're one up on me now because I said in the last post I would go topless if I believed for one minute you're actually in on all this.

I posted the picture on July 17th




On July 18th I noticed tropical storm Cimaron... see Ma run...


Yes, and I came prepared to trot! Just keep regaling me with those synchromystical patisseries. Although... mystical soldier of love are not words I'd use to describe you... boots on the ground, maybe. I'm just as content playing by myself, picking up on your key words, those which amuse me.

I call this one the gold suit New Rule because my old gold outfit is classic souvenir dance garb. When you mentioned the lady wearing it is the mayor... I heard another Iselle/Ellis island back flip tour de force! Mayor - you're Ma. I checked that TV show you're talking about, there's no zombie, no ghost, barely a black guy! Anyway, in our story we got em all, if you count as the zombie...



So, armed with this fresh batch of word associations, on July 23rd I dusted off a video from a couple years back. July's storms Barry (bar hee!) and Leepi (leap hee!) celebrated my return to the clubs, although I didn't have the fresh twerk video... yet.




This was greeted with a doozie insult hurricane, July 24th's Dorian. DorĂ© is french for gold, and Ă˘ne means donkey. Even I recognized a similarity between me twerking in my gold suit and a dancing donkey! This was followed by the more palatable Flossie on July 25th. Sept. 3rd's Kiko - kick oh - was cute, but Dorian... that was the kicker. None of this deters me, at 51, from hitting the clubs! I detected a repentant breeze on Sept. 3rd with tropical storm Toragi (in french 'tort' (silent t) is 'wrong' and agi is 'acted').





Was it the donkey analogy or the Charlotte Gerson lecture on how her family cures cancer with juicing and coffee enemas? In any case, around the end of August I started to feel weak and sick. Watching 91 year old Charlotte speak enthusiastically for 4 hours made me think I should be twerking all night at breakneck speeds. Instead, I was catching a cold. When I heard her mention Gerson cures hypersensitivity, I decided to put aside my 20 year old aversion to medical treatment and give the alternative Gerson therapy a try. Did these storms add to the drama? I saw 'Je big ill' in Jebi and Gill, and felt sicker than ever...


I ordered the required supplements including organic coffee, and carefully watched video instructions by enema addicts.


When the stuff from Amazon finally arrived, I popped the tube, pooped like never before and flopped into bed for a heroin style rush, just like in the Beatles songs.

All's well and good, it's psychedelic AND good for you too!? That is, until an hour later when I got hungry and realized I couldn't eat the rest of the day. Fasting when you're hungry is a bummer and deterred me from joining the enema club, but the next day's tropical storm Pewa (pew ah!) was kinda funny.


In the aftermath I do benefit tremendously from Gerson even though I don't make the grade for enemas. After 20 years, I finally did some blood tests which turned out fine, and use an Omega masticating juicer which retains more enzymes than ordinary centrifugal juicers. I now eat completely organic, including untainted produce from a fertile island nearby which is completely ignored by Monsanto! Shockingly, larger Caribbean islands like Santo Domingo and Guadeloupe are being marketed pesticides which have been banned by the EPA!

All this time I wasn't optimized for blogging, so you didn't hear from me for a couple weeks. I found this neglected look kind of entertaining, and please, no anal analogies!



This was punctuated on August 15th with hurry-up-and-write tropical storm Erin, heading straight for me and showing me the error of my neglecting ways.


I sent you this and Erin immediately went north.

Erin is coming straight at me. I know I have to update the blog and I intend to. Chill.


Lo and behold, today October 12th we're looking at 98L brewing in the Atlantic. If I blog diligently, I assume never-to-be Lorenzo will only assuage our 'low rains... oh!'


I have to admit I've been putting off writing this blog, and now I'm struggling with it...



So, to fill the empty space over the summer I sent more dance videos, another gold suit one, made all the more relevant by Miley Cyrus' superb performance on the VMAs. Turns out she successfully calculated her outrageous performance to fling herself into mega star orbit - by redefining herself .

Watching VMAs. Haven't been in a strip club in a while, but good to see nothing has changed

Strip club works as key words... here's a gold suit until the blog is ready. Cam on chair fell on time!




That's when Ornella arrived. The day after she got here, somewhere in the world there was tropical depression Juliette, a romantic prelude of what was to come.

I told you about her in this tweet...

Here's the guns of August! Taking some time off with a guest, she's a gorgeous Cambodian-Parisian cutie.




We were having a great time fluttering around the islands... until one morning I woke up to my angel pledging his love for her, with me out of the loop! A few minutes later he came back with 'just kiddin!' but the joke wasn't done yet. First I noticed the name, Horn elle ah!... Really, thinking about horning me all along! Then on Sept 5th, tropical storm Gabriel: gab - rit (rit is laugh in french, silent t) - elle, which was exactly how we reacted to the news! We even had Lorena... low rain ah! to realize her wish for sunshine. Then everything devolved sordidly with tropical storms Yutu... Humberto ... hump her too...  Manuelle... man you elle, Ingrid... in a grid... Is that a new sex toy? A new position? and Man-yi... man, why I? By Sept 14th, the map looked like this:




The episode was capped on Sept 22nd by Pabuk... Pa be yuk.



In the meantime, you went to Jamaica with Anjulie, whose fall tour with Chris Brown was cancelled. Why pick Chris Brown??? He's been nothing but trouble so far and it happenned again with Anjulie... I found it interesting they said he cancelled because he had a seizure... HAARPed a la Theresa Heinz? Remember my stocking stuffer tweet about the Theresa Heinz 'seizure'?

At least Ed had Twitter to keep him company. Here he is flinging it out:
Edward Snowden ‏@EJosephSnowden 9 Jul
When Mrs. Kerry learned about #PRISM, she was hysterical, threatening to go public, divorce, you name it. THAT is when THEY HAARP'ed her.
Funny! Or is it? I was looking for that tweet on his page today and it’s gone…Back in mid July I entered that tweet on The Contrail and that whole post about Snowden disappeared….  I scoured through Google for half an hour and finally found it on a Polish website.

While on the subject, I also saw Cara on the illuminati owned Weather Channel, in a show called Hacking the Planet... making fun of chemtrails! Some scientist... already toeing the party line.

It's just as well I'm showing you a bunch of girls, and you're posing with disembodied arms, mascots, statues and stuffed figurines in your instagrams. Umm, pictures and videos with the opposite sex, subject matters for possible future tests?

Anyway, let's get back to our present experiment with the physics of emotions, cause that's what scientists are supposed to do: experiment. To summarize, after my six month leave of absence there was the Moore tornado debacle, followed by test #1... has anybody seen the bridge? The niggerology taunt courtesy of Paula Deen and Chris Brown followed suit, and now it's time to record our observations of the twerk effect.

It's a good thing Miley used the oldest trick in the book to get attention, sticking out her awe inspiring tongue, as everyone went twerk crazy after that, including me. I hadn't done a dance video in a while, still recycling the old ones, so this was on cue. Still, I knew it would be dangerous to taunt fate with yet another test, so I made a kinda fuzzy video shot from a far distance and called it twat flopping...


We went twat flopping last night. No twerk, this is not a test!




Instinctively I knew it was dangerous to initiate a test in the midst of US/Syria war drums. Then I found this online, which seemed to confirm the warning.

I told you! twerking could be dangerous...





By mid September I detected some impatience. Sept 16th is also when the navy Yard shooter erupted with his self confessed 'remote controlled' killing spree.




Finally, on Sept 17th I sent you 'bruk the bench'. These girls were bruking the place down!  I had set down the camera on the bench at Soggy Dollar bar in St. Maarten. In the islands we say bruk it, wine your body gyal! This isn't a promotional gimmick, when we twerk it gets hot. I have on pearl silver pants... Now all we had to do was wait for the outcome of the experiment.




The very same day tropical storm Usagi formed in the Pacific, which eventually became a deadly typhoon killing at least 25 people in China. 'You Soggy' alluding to Soggy Dollar bar? Or, you sag, hee!? Probably both... sneaking in a sideways sag joke, keepin it real...


A couple days later you aired a New Rule where you said Fuck You seven times in a row, followed the next day by a mall massacre in Can Ya? But overall nothing pinged satisfyingly back to the twerk.



By the end of September, I was wondering if this test was working at all... or even if anybody loved me anymore. Was the magic extinguished? Were we breaking up? The first sign was tropical storm Sepat, immediately followed by Jerry and Fitow. Separate? Je rie - I laugh... Fitow - Veto!


Cute!

October 1st in the US was a beautiful day from sea to shining sea, and then the tea party went berserk and decided to shut down the government to force the Dems to defund Obamacare... Did they really think that shit would work, or were they HAARPed too? By Oct 2nd, massive snow storm Atlas began blanketing the Northwest... That was the first clue. At last, here comes the blowback! I feel this one happened on two levels, as massive disbelief and anger all over the country (and the world) also precipitated a communal physics of emotions, the likes of which we usually see in an election year... last year it was Sandy. So far hurricane season in the western hemisphere had been strangely quiet. This is attributed to dry air, no doubt due to chemtrail aerosol spraying. On Oct 1st, convection started to organize in the Western Caribbean and on the 3rd, a storm called Karen threaded the needle between Cuba and Mexico.



With Obamacare as the main reason for the shutdown, a storm called Karen - Carin' - is a flashing strobe of a sign. The storm headed towards New Orleans, but was squelched by all the 'dry air'. Nevertheless the emotions still needed to vent and by Oct 4th, the weather menu was a quadruple whammy between Karen, Atlas, the sudden uprising of Santa Ana winds and midwest tornado outbursts, notably with F4 damage in Wayne NE - wine your body gyal!



I tweeted some updates in real time, including:

"At last… I’d been expecting a meltdown of some sort after I sent you that twerk video. At least the Republicans are taking the heat."

Pingback accelerated when a lady named Miriam Carey - merry am car hee! - broke through a barricade close to the White House and led police on a car chase ending in her getting killed by police. I sent you my 'interpretation' of events:

"Yesterday I noticed you tweeted right around the time twirling Miriam placed capitol hill on lock down… Had you just read my note and were perhaps thinking I’m crazy? Thanks for classic comedic timing!"

Miriam's boyfriend seemed to think so as well...



The next day it happened again, except the pingback readings flew off the scale! The latest wackatoon Washington headline was a man setting himself on fire at the National Mall. Something so weird I wasn't going to let this one go up in smoke without an investigation. I found a line from your October 4th blog about the traditional bargaining strategies behind raising the debt ceiling versus today's Republican harakiri method of really allowing the government to fall apart.

Your HBO blog:  "It's like if you gave people permission to burn the king in effigy, and they read it as permission to set the actual regent aflame. It might feel good but try getting the smell of burning flesh out of drapes."

 The blog had its first comment a 3:51 pm, right before the AP reported the man on fire at 5:15. Did you publish this creepy prediction before it happened? Or was the comment posted at 3:51 Pacific time, meaning you were inspired by the tragedy to write this? Further inquiry in the blog's RSS metadata shows the blog was published at 8:14 pm GMT, which is 4:14 pm EST, exactly 6 minutes before the man lit the match according to police reports. 












Whether or not the first comment was Pacific or Eastern time no longer mattered after I looked up the RSS metadata, clearly delineating the spooky minute-by-minute timing of the prophecy. The next day's capture of terrorist Anas al-Liby made it quite clear the 'time zone' alibi was assumptive. At the same time, Typhoon Danas endowed the alibi with a well deserved dan ranking.



Then I took a second look at your website's home page photo below, adding fuel to the fire.



And yet another flaming arrow from Sept 20th. Note I sent the twerk video Sept 17th.



What am I getting at with all this? I looked up the dream interpretation of the man on fire. Besides the obvious, which is to be consumed with passion, it also signifies a spiritual transformation. Could it be that after seven years of sharing every detail of my observations, you're seeing a pattern too?! Individually, any of the ideas on the blog might seem like fiction weaved from facts, but when seen as a stream of events, aren't these incidences forming a narrative? I know I'm not that imaginative... I match furniture styles, fabric patterns and paint colors for a living. Don't shoot me, I'm only the decorator! By the way here's your front page these days:


And a photo of last week's New Rule:






Since last week I've been getting subtle hints, like the photo below taken from a video you made for PETA, filled with cat torture and cat parts. By the way, thanks for the 100,000 robocalls to UW Madison staff, that's why I love you!



But on a deeper level, did I say something to elicit aggression? Was it this tweet about Emmy rejection once again, about looking cute when you're mad?


Is the tormentor Emily? She playing hard to get? Maybe we think you so cute when you're mad! Catherine Emily Brown

Or this one? I know some guys freak out at the mere mention of the word.

I feel the episode is going to finish, the psychic energy is subsiding and my period is just about over.

What annoys me is the blanket classification of mental illness to rationalize sporadic violent outburts of otherwise normal people. I'm not buying that. I have first hand experience in mind control as I'm sharing myself with a presence which can just as as easily make me pleasure myself, as make me kill myself. The big difference between me and those poor souls is that I'm happily loving my captor... actually we belong to each other. He wakes me up when it's time to go dancing, or if I've been sleeping on the sofa too long. Which brings us to the concepts of predeterminism vs free will. If technology is opening up the Pandora's Box of mind control, where does one end and the other pick up? I hate to bring it up again, but we'll all go crazy thinkink about this, unless we somehow integrate the Tantric concept of all beings as one.

Well today is October 16th. Thanks to President Obama the Affordable Care Act is safe and the government is funded... until January 15th, my birthday... Luckily it looks like you're ready to take a break from testing. Do name games make somebody wanna puke? Here's your take on Speaker Boehner's government shutdown coping mechanism.




Whether or not the preponderance of evidence in this blog is rooted in actual 'assoteric disclosure', there are other tell-tale weather anomalies that can't be explained by conventional means, like yet another weirdly muffled hurricane season in the western hemisphere, juxtaposed with so many killer typhoons in the East. At least seventeen killer storms, out of which six were category 3, 4 or 5... so far... and now here comes Francisco. (The last video holds a clue to this name.) I haven't yet heard a credible 'official' explanation for this discrepancy; Time magazine attributes it to luck, and they wonder why people aren't paying attention to them!



I found Super Typhoon Phailin interesting, threatening to obliterate Odessa, India as the US government was failing miserably. While tropical storm Karen was supressed, was all that anger energy transmuted to the East where typhoons are free to roam.? Or perhaps are the typhoons even HAARPed into a frenzy?

You came up with a credible theory...




In closing, here's some vintage video. The blond lady is my step-mother Elizabeth, who taught me how to hang around the house naked!


Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Disaster Porn Diary


So I scintillate in mystery, not subdued by the need for proof… that's my motto. What about you? Are you entertained by all the details I studiously record? Do you fantasize about being laid bare as the better half of the Jesus revue?  Are you sprinkling a trail of clues to get caught? They say it’s the intellectual criminal’s most fervent desire. Here's a nugget: before I proposed the cosmically correct spelling of Joker Star Naive, I noticed you tweeted Dzhokhar Tsarnaev’s name as Joker, but after I sent you the blog, you called him Johar. I pick up on these signals like poker chips, redeemable when the stakes pile up.

But let’s enter even darker territory… I’d like to know, are your feelings in any way connected to the apparent reaction I got when I sent you pictures from this collection?











I tweeted the pictures along with this:


@billmaher After 3 days of tornadoes I figure out Rozel http://blogs.kansas.com/weather/2013/05/20/video-of-damaging-ef2-tornado-near-rozel-saturday/ … (rose-elle) is more than a flower. 




I tweeted it at 12:31 pm. Hover over the date on the tweet to see the time stamp. The Rozel name alludes to my tweet revival, punctuated with a twinge of Jesus drudgery… but within one and a half hours of my post, here comes the Moore tornado! I sat transfixed in front of CNN as total destruction accompanied the usual flurry of word associations. Besides Rozel, Shawnee, an Indian name for dangerous beauty, had first felt the wind. The actual Moore tornado touched down in Newcastle; my new house is the setting for the pictures. Sitting there for half an hour listening to the deadpan voices of anchormen anticipating the unfolding calamity, I finally got the ‘more’ message and uploaded another picture with the following caption. It beamed out 5 minutes after the Moore tornado dissipated:


@billmaher Here's Moore, OK? 



Then and there, CNN warned about possible rotation in Ardmore and Brownwood…

Your tweet the next day tied it all up with a bow:


i feel bad for the victims in OKL, was just in the state, but when there's no more to actually report, the media engages in #DisasterPorn


In response to this comment, I think it's part of the grieving process to share the experience with the world. In the context of my pictures, I agree with you completely.

Trying to make sense of all this destruction in tandem with my centerfold re-appearance is difficult. It couldn’t just be the visuals that evoked this visceral metaphor. I keep going back to my original phrase, “Rozel (rose elle) is more than a flower.” Well then, how much more is it? What, if anything, do these co-incidences mean? The mass immolation, immense loss, unimaginable suffering… those children who drowned in the school basement, a supposedly safe place, they were sacrificed, weren’t they?

What I can see clearly is that American society is not as civilized as it pretends to be. Here comes my building rant again… in the Caribbean we use poured concrete forms and/or blocks reinforced with steel every 16 inches. We also build concrete roofs, or tie in a zinc roof with a steel reinforced concrete ring beam all around the top of the house, like a solid belt. Everyone has to do it by law, no matter how humble the abode. In the States, the houses are made of sticks and the schools are brick face, perhaps with steel girders, but I didn't see poured concrete. Is the lumber lobby in the way of preventive building techniques? There has to be a shady economic reason. Now they’re showing off a car that withstands tornadoes while people cower in papier-mâchĂ© houses.

Turning everything to splinters is entirely opposite to my idea of magic…  I decorate for a living and consider myself a neat person. I sympathize with Monk. Nor do I relate to depressing art or trendy angst. Our angel senses how upset I’ve been… I understand that in the symbolic dimension there is no one to blame, but, still, I can’t help but draw infernal inferences. Would Moore have been better off had it been called Less? The day after my message, “here’s Moore OK?”  I noted a response to my rant loops, in the word Oklahoma… OK la ho Ma... followed on May 24th by an 8.3 earthquake in the Russian sea of Okhotsk – OK ho tsk. Thanks for the appeasement!

I much prefer the funny name game of the Popocatepetl volcano, which erupted May 15th. I noticed it the day I called you out on the neglect of your internet façade, with red eyes rampant again in the picture below. I guess that's the mark of Real Time guests.
In this instance no one got hurt and I laughed for days at being the popo in popo Catie pet elle… that is until I ran across the video of Kelly Thomas, a schizophrenic homeless man beaten to death by even more crazy popo.


@billmaher Zach comes out as an alien in this picture... you're the only one with no red eye here... host perk? Popo-catie-pet-elle






While we’re documenting, let’s not forget tropical storm Alvin on May 16th, the first Pacific storm of the season. You’ll recall my cistern water gushed all over Yoyo’s floor. Well, after much rain, Alvin announced the cistern have half in, plus you’ll be happy to hear it filled up since. And although there’s no disaster to go with this, my gluten free diet ended almost as quickly as it began; I’m back to eating organic wheat pasta. This gluten free fad took me overboard on corn and rice! I’m hanging on to the dairy free part though, so... no meat, cheese or butter but lots of fancy nut snacks, like Sahale’s Valdosta pecans with sweet cranberries, black pepper and orange zest.  Mostly I enjoy plain fruit like papaya and mango.

Back to our bittnet... you might be wondering why I replied to this tweet with another picture accompanied by the word ‘test’.

Bill Maher‏@billmaher 27 May

The Pope says Atheists can go to heaven! Yay, I'm booking my flight right now. Right after my cruise to Atlantis. Thanks, Francis!



@billmaher Test: 


This is one of my favorite beaches in Cap Juluca, Anguilla. Basically I was performing an experiment to see what would happen this time when I send a picture. You didn’t disappoint. I tweeted it at 5:57 and at 6:00 a bomb scare halted traffic for an hour on the Brooklyn Bridge!

 I noticed God also answered your tweet...

@billmaher Yes, but there's a catch. You have to let Jesus enter you first.


Good thing Tibetan philosophy emphasizes the concept of infinity; could be eons til I get to represent!

Your tweet after I sent the picture didn’t disappoint either:

Syrian war turning into clusterfuck of all clusterfucks - and John McCain wants in! Now! Thank U Jesus for that man never becoming president

 ~
So, here we are, the next morning. Overnight our loving angel asked if I could remove the word criminal from the first paragraph. I said ok, what about infidel? Anyway, there’s been two numbered invests swirling around the Pacific for days now, and I’ve been waiting more or less patiently for the storm names to pop up. This morning we have Barbara – barbare ah! Barbare in French means barbarian! I think I should replace the word criminal. Let’s re-phrase the sentence… where’s the Thesaurus…

Are you sprinkling a trail of clues to get caught? They say it’s the romantic outlaw’s most fervent desire.


Still waiting for the next storm… By the way, Dr. Masters showed us NOAA’s predictions for the upcoming Atlantic season. The diagram has St. Maarten in the Main Development Rectangle!  I can’t stop laughing this morning…

Saturday, May 11, 2013

"I'm here. I'm free now." ~ Amanda Berry's 911 call on May 6th

Dear Bill,

Say earth girls are easy if you like, but I'm back here again, thanks to just one word from you. Before we get to that, here's an obligatory take on the Boston Marathon bombing. Some conspiracy theorists (your comedy fodder) feel the massacre happened during a hyper-realistic, false flag op... remember, there was a planned terror drill during the attack. They point the finger at the gov't via the Craft paramilitary organization, and argue the FBI abetted and facilitated the Tsarnaev boys as patsies... One thing seems clear though: when freedom of thought and information lead to such polarization of ideas, reality gets harder and harder to pin down. After seeing all the graphic images, I find it hard to swallow the concept that this was staged. On the other hand it's disturbing to find this picture in People Magazine of all places, which shows Tsarnaev's hand is clearly photoshopped, feeding into the 'conspiracy' theory that he still had his backpack after the blast. Yet, how could the photoshopper be so clumsy as to leave traces of a hand?!  I can't believe a graphic artist could be so careless... even if they work for the FBI. Are TPTB trying to provoke the alternative media? Or is 'reality' the product of so much contradictory thinking that it's tampered with - in and of itself?


After reading this sobering article by Tony Cartalucci detailing a consistent FBI involvement with domestic terrorism, your proposition that terrorism is designed to scare us into blowing up the balance sheet begs the logical conclusion that terrorism is the hell spawn of a lucrative taxpayer funded business, as are wars in general. So, do you think we'll get to hear Dzhokhar Tsarnaev and Colorado shooter James Holmes chatter as much as Jodi Arias?



I did notice more and more mainstream intellectuals are curious about conspiracy theories. Many of these ideas are simply spins on a reality which is not defined by the highest bidders. In the poker game of consciousness, the sheltered masses are forced to remove an article of clothing each time someone like you exposes them to new aberrations, like the threat of a FEMA roundup. Even though your statistics rightly attest that it's stupid to worry about having to survive an attack by the gov't, you're still giving the conspiracy story some legs... no such thing as bad advertising. On the bright side, Matt Taibbi is on his way to the San Rafael Public Banking Conference... he can media launder a few ideas about that!  

And what about Family Guy's eerie prediction of the Boston bombing? What was that all about? Another pile of baba ghanoush?

Although the inconsistencies above are growing pains, par for the course in free thinking evolution, they're clear cut arithmetic compared to the brutal calculus I've had for homework... Yet, I still feel it's all part of nature. Here we go...

When the bombing occurred I was horrified and relieved it had absolutely nothing to do with us. Until I beamed the memo as I opened my eyes the next morning. Dzhokhar Tsarnaev... Joker Star Naive. I have to admit it summed up my feelings so sweetly, a wave of vindication swept over me, and still elicits a smile. Assuming you really are part of this equation, how could you expect me to act any differently? I'm comfortable in my nest on the hill, and I find our anti-relationship a fascinating study. Instinctively, I think if I came backstage to one of your shows, it would very likely deflate the whole metaphysical soufflĂ©!

We found out the brothers intended to strike on the fourth of July, but the bombs were finished quicker... interesting they chose the Marathon - Ma wrath on. The simultaneous explosion near Waco - wake oh! - in West, Texas - Ou est? text us... brought home the point with a big kaboom.  A couple more joker trademark quips came up, like the bomber's mom's name, Zubeidat Tsarnaev - You Be That Star Naive - a retort right on par with Pee Wee! And how about the aunt's name, Maret Tsarnaeva -Ma Write Star Never - not! I'm here now. There's more, but the rest is conjecture - ha!

So, which word seduced me to come back?

Do you recall back in 2008, I was on your phpBB forum? I brought up tropical storm Iselle, the first hurricane name reference I ever wrote you about. A little identifier to introduce myself...



Did you have the prodigious wit to tie her into your tweet from April 24th, 2013?

Bill Maher@billmaher

Hey let's not let the #douchebagbrothers affect the immigration bill. Except the part where you get a pronounceable name on Ellis Island.

Iselle... Ellis... It's such a colossal loop, I'm not taking any chances - I'm back... mesmerized by a rhetorical double twist!



Alright, enough applause, let's return to something more natural, like a rant. Have we had enough Jesus analogies? Christburger! I squirm each time. If there's anything you and I agree on, it's that spirituality is cheapened by the priest middle man. Priests and religious leaders in general contradict the very essence of spiritual development: independent thinking, self-discovery, trusting one's instinct and finding happiness within.

First there was your New Rules asking 'has anyone seen my cat?' "Please Jesus give me the strength to not fuck my cat!"... with your two arms up in the air! Then the 'Jesus has Risen' poster, flanked by your homey Downtown Julie Brown ( I had to digitally remove the red eye... someone in your entourage should do those things for you before these pictures circulate), now here comes 'Jesus is like Rihanna; no matter how bad you treat him he still loves you', nice covert approach but that name Brown still rings a bell.... Asking for forgiveness was all over the April 26th show. Even New Rules was about Mark Sanford's redemption vs Anthony Weiner's prolonged penance in the corner.





Finally I tweeted you on May 1st, and next thing you know, Jesus is coming back. Here's the clip from last week's show.





Don't you think 'antichrist' would describe us better? I had a cryptic, hand over my eyes laugh when I saw Nostradamus' name for the third antichrist, the one we haven't met yet.. after Napoleon - PAU, NAY, LORON and Hilter - Hister... It's Mabus - Ma bust! If I ever conclusively believe that you are playing an active part in all this, I'm bound to keep my word from the last post and go topless... plus, Ma will bust you! As we know, it's entirely for your own good... a little lovin' magic never hurt anyone.

As April 30th's Tropical Cyclone Zane alludes, it's possible to be sane and zany at the same time...



While we're here, let's go down the list...

Winter storm Virgil warned that my Cat Minou had a ear infection... which we are treating successfully. Storm Xerxes happened as I sent this blog to TedX Whitechapel speaker Charles Eisenstein, whose talk inspired me -  Xer sees. By the way, those are the kind of people I send the blog to: thinkers, shamans, neuropsychologists and the like. Names I pick up from Ted talks and Through the Wormhole. I'm still waiting for some breakthrough explanation!

Around the same time we had the evocative snow storm name Yogi, and Zeus (a figure with a lightning bolt?) and now just as I was felled with the flu following two weeks of intense partying for Carnaval, here's Achilles... achoo! Here are some pictures of Jump Up, our fuck you to your police state! I'm finally recovered and ready to go out dancing this weekend with my friend and downstairs tenant, Joya, who is the dutch beauty pictured in the Carnaval shot wearing the paintball splattered aqua colored pants.






Then there's the watertown episode. Remember last week, my second tweet was a compliment about the rain after months of sunshine, and how the cistern was finally getting filled? Well, the very next day Joya's kitchen pipe broke and all the cistern water gushed out! Here she is scooping inches of water off the floor. We're taking it in stride... focusing instead on dancing.


To update a previous post, the resurgence of vaporizing weed was short lived. From a hypersensitive point of view, the high is somewhat vulgar... wrought with static. Actually this is kinda funny and kinda pathetic. Yesterday there was tropical cyclone 24S out there and I looked everywhere in vain to see its future name. This morning I found it: Jamala. I knew from before that in order to make sense, it should reflect my ultimate let down with weed (remember I spent hours on the net researching the vaporizer and water bubbler attachment, followed by a couple cyclone names to celebrate their arrival). Well, the name Jamala is a jokull on the Jesus rib - Jah... mal is french for bad and ah... well, I have to admit... years of heavy drugs in my youth hanging out with Don Alias and Dave Sanborn have taken their toll. Jah mal ah. I remember Dave himself used to travel with a full macrobiotic kitchen. Here's how I'm trying to align my chakras: a shamanesque lady friend gave me acupuncture, accompanied by a channeling session using a Tibetan singing bowl. She said she called on whichever spirits were in the neighborhood. It felt great... for a few minutes it felt like I serenely contained the sun. To follow up, she also gave me great advice to go gluten and dairy free. Now, a couple weeks later I'm beginning to feel the benefits... I even accidentally mis-spelled Marathon to Ma Rah Thin!

And now, I'm just about to publish after re-reading this thing over and over. I check Weather Underground and see Cyclone Mahasen just formed... Ma hasten... ok. ok...I'm sending it now!